Heckling Scales Concept by Tim Bukoski
Heckling Scale...for runway waifs
	"Smurphy." "Please put your entire body on the scale." "You are at your ideal weight...for a canary." "There is actually a chocolate sec- tion of the supermarket." "If you get bruised by sitting down, something's wrong." "Try three dimensions." "Helium is bad for you."

Heckling Scale...for the poundage challenged
"Ever consider life in the Navy...as ballast?" "Kay-ripes, man! What is this...a bathroom or a truck stop?" "Why'd ya stop at thirds?" "What? Were they out the Super-Jumbo size?" "I don't see all the fuss over whale extinction..." "...and the other axle?" "Check your oil too, sir?" "One at a time please."