The Lies NASA Told Us About the Sun



We've all seen the sun, right? That big, bright-ass ball in the sky? The one they're always telling us not to look at? Well, a few months ago, I got a little suspicious of these warnings. -I mean, why would they go through all the trouble to tell everybody not to look at something that is right there in the sky? Well, let me tell you something; It's not because it will make you go blind. I've been staring at the sun for about a month now, and my vision is just fine. I've been staring at the sun quite often, looking, and looking, and staring, and looking, and I am not blind. But what's better, not only am I not blind, but I can see all sorts of things I couldn't before. I can see thoughts, foliage, children, and I can even see the love floating in the air. It looks like a jellyfish, really. A big jellyfish with hugs and tentacles to kill you.

-But why would anybody lie to us about the sun? Why? Why,why, Why? Because they don't want us to have the power it gives us. Superman got his power from starring at the sun, and so will I. And when I am strong enough, I will kill them. I'll crush them all with cars and pieces of food big enough to crush a man with. But you know who they are? NASA! NASA is who has been trying to keep us from our mother sun! Why? Because they want to control us! They sit around all day in their evil observatories, taking turns looking into the sun through high powered telescopes, trying to see how much sun a man can handle at one time, always trying to make themselves more powerfull by their god Sol! Well, I will be ready for them when they come. When they come and try to tear up the beautiful streets of metropolis, I will stare at them with the sun from my eyes burning their skin, and I will crush them all and feed them to the homeless, because the sun runs strong in my family. My father stared into the sun, as did his father before him. The sun is in my blood now, and that is much stronger than any of their evil telescopes and sun-machines. And they can make all the solar-power-panels they want, but it cannot equal my determination! I will not look away! I will have more sun than those bastards!!! Those selfish, evil, evil, NASA bastards!!! But I have their power too!!! I WILL stop them!!!!!! HA HA!!! HA HA HA!