Crappy Band of the Month
Written By Chi Chi
-I'm starting a new segment now: Crappy Band of the Month. Why, you ask? Because there are bands out there that, frankly, shouldn't be. How many times have you been listening to the radio and heard a song you could just not bear to listen to? Too many times, if you ask me. That's why I took it as my responsibility to inform you, the public, as to which bands I, personally, cannot stand to listen to. If you have any complaints, dirrect them towards the bands themselves. It's their fault for not being more likable by me.
This month's band is:
- Puppy Slaughter -
This band got together as a bet. They wanted to see just how bad a death metal band could be before people would start to notice. -At least that's my theory. It's the only logical reason I could come up with as to why they're still together. I mean, their drummer always loses his stick when he twirls it. The guitar player had to quit after he smashed his guitar at the first show, and because he couldn't afford a new one, they've been playing with just bass and drums while he raises money to buy another one. The problem with the bass player is that he knows he's not any good, so he turns his volume down so no one can hear him screw up on stage. Consequentially, the recent shows have basically been bad drum solos constantly stopping to let the drummer recover his sticks. I hope you have heard enough to stay away from these guys. If not, write me. There's pleanty more where that came from, baby.