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Colloquial Contest

GDT's first, and possibly last contest. For the next few weeks we will be printing up several common colloquialisms which have been reconstructed in a more verbose manner. The winner of the contest will be the person capable of deciphering more of these colloquialisms than anyone else. The prize will be fifty dollars (cash, none of this "the card" crap), and if the winner chooses, they may also become privy to the secrets of "Cafe Diablo" the most diabolical coffee in the world and the official drink of Hell Inc. The winner's name will be posted in the first issue of volume 4. All answers must be sent to GDT by Reading Day (February 21st, 1996) at the end of the quarter. GDT bids you good luck.

This Week's Colloquialisms:

  • 7. The stylus is more potent than the claymore.
  • 8. It is futile to attempt to indoctrinate a superannuated canine with innovative manuevers.
  • 9. Eschew the implant of creection and vitiate the scion.

GDT Colloquial Contest
Rules and Regulations:

This contest is restricted to only those people registered as students at the RIT campus. Others may send answers, but may not be counted among the winners circle.

Additional...
...all GDT staff members are prohibited from entering this contest, as well as any of their family members, lovers, pets, or body parts. Any GDT staff member caught leaking information to the public at large will be given their choice of five delightful hedious executions, in addition to having to make a batch of Cafe Diablo for the staff.
Send answers to diablo@csh.rit.edu, or send replies to: 472 French Rd., Rochester, NY 14618
If you should happen to miss any of the issues from volume 3, you may find them on our web site, or alternatively you can purchase hard copies through our fan club.

After Dinner Mints
-by Mark Nowak

It is always interesting to discover the origins of our modern traditions, often finding out how different they used to be and how they have changed as society has changed. One wonderful tradition is the use of a diamond as an engagement ring. How many centuries ago did this tradition start? Why a diamond? Does it have a special significance in the area of the world where the tradition originated? The answer to the last question is: you bet it does.
In South Africa, where most of the diamonds in the world are mined, there is but one company doing the mining: DeBeers. This same company decides who they distribute their diamonds to for cutting.
Yeah, they've got the world on a string, sitting on a rainbow....because the idea of using a diamond as an engagement ring, thought up by our friends at DeBeers in the early part of this century as a way of selling more diamonds, is now a hallowed wedding tradition. What's three months' salary for something that will last forever? A lot, considering diamonds aren't as rare as emeralds or sapphires, but cost more because the good people at DeBeers can charge whatever they want for their product in the absence of competition. So just remember this little fact when the 25th Anniversary Diamond Bracelet is a hallowed anniversary tradition.
"Tell her you'd get suckered by a slick marketing ploy...all over again."

Responses and submissions can be sent to:diablo@csh.rit.edu
or 472 French Rd, Rochester, NY 14618
Gracies Dinnertime Theatre reserves the right to reprint
any correspondance recieved, without prior editing.


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